Hard Days are Blessings

Allow me to be vulnerable for a moment. And be patient… I’m long-winded but the moral of the story will come.

Some days I totally suck. Anger is a real, deep rooted sin struggle of mine.

I have said it before and I’ll say it again
I’ve grown. I’m not who I was back then.
But here I am still mortal, still splashing in my sin.

As a dog that returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly… Proverbs 26:11

I don’t scream.
Physically no one’s getting hurt.
But the sting of words might be worse.

I am foolish and when I am feeling overwhelmed I react in a way that makes me sad. I don’t hit, I don’t throw a fit, I don’t scream profanities or throw things or slam doors or any of the things that would have been typical for me ten years ago. I raise my voice to get the attention of my kids and respond to those I love in full blown sarcasm.

Seems harmless. But what you can’t see is the bitterness taking root inside. I am thankful for a husband who allows me to tap out for a few minutes after a largely overwhelming day spent sending boys to timeout. I am thankful for friends that extend forgiveness and somehow overlook my flaws.

Yet, some don’t feel so inclined to forgive. Which means that’s a relationship I have broken by my harsh tone and words. And that makes me sad. Sometimes the bitterness in my heart continues to grow and I find myself lashing out to someone who has hurt me instead of approaching them in love and with compassion.

Today was a hard day. Personally, I think it’s the hard days that God uses to refine us. Many years ago, I would have not seen my wrongs and worse yet I would not have apologized for them. Today, I feel genuine conviction for my life and attitude to be different. I can go to my children and humble myself with an apology. I can reach out to friends and risk my pride to ask for forgiveness. Even though, today was hard, today was a blessing.

The hard days are blessings if you let them draw you nearer to God.